For as long as I can remember I have known I was meant for something big. I don't know what it is I'll do that will be so special, but it WILL happen. These days I mostly imagine I'll be big in the science/biol field and perhaps discover some secret to saving a species from extinction or solve some big mystery or something. Hell, my 4th year project could have some big impact on the chances of survival or the breeding program for the western swamp tortoise but I've always kinda hoped I'd have super powers of some form one day. I watch all these movies and tv shows where ordinary people gain extraordinary powers, see: The Secret World of Alex Mack, Heroes, X-men, Sky High... Imagine my dissappointment when puberty came and I DIDN'T get powers. Now I guess I gotta hope for a nuclear spill or something. Seriously, if there wasn't a massive risk of leukemia I'd find some nuclear waste and roll around in it. I mean I don't actually believe it's possible for people to be able to do any of the things they can do in these movies and I don't think any amount of "genetic" and "nuclear" explanations can make it seem plausible, but oh my god, that doesn't stop me from wanting it to happen to me. You can't even begin to imagine what I would do for powers.

There are so many people in these shows who seem to hate their gift. I don't know what is wrong with these people. Why would ANYONE want to be normal when they can do awesome things. Even the touching people and they die thing, even that could work out well for a person. I don't like the touch of skin and I'd love to be able to kill people easily and with low risk of getting caught. The hardest part would be not being able to touch my dogs. That would be really bad.

Hearing people's thoughts... well it would take some getting used to, and you couldn't tell anyone (lest you risk the relationship) but overall you could REALLY use it to your advantage.

I think I'd prefer to be able to put thoughts into people's minds though. I'd use it to tell that girl on the bus how ugly her hair is. Or to tell that dude that I respect his taste in music but he should turn it down because headphones should never be up that loud. This power would work well if you could also know what people were thinking but would be nice on it's own too. I think my recent wanting for this one stems from my desire to control everyone.

Flying is one I've pondered for most of my life. I think it's the freedom I want. It's also a form of safety/protection. If you can fly you can escape all land based dangers as well as eliminating any risk of falling from a height. I have many dreams about being able to fly. It's often used to escape dangers/pests/risks but sometimes I use it to find my way home, or to see from a decent height, or just for fun. Most often in my dreams I "swim" through the air as if air has the density of water and I can just move my arms and legs like I'm swimming and move through it. I have had the superman-type of flying dreams, but they are very rare and not noteworthy. Recently (in the last few months) I had a dream where flying was like telekinesis, a sort of pushing down upon the ground to push myself up. It was strangely vivid and it required a lot of concentration to control (I ended up getting caught by the evil people...)

Communing with animals/plants. This can be done in many ways... talking to, making grow, understanding urges, controlling... This is one that I've always felt close to (and jealous of those who have it). I think this one stems from my love of nature, and desire to feel close to it (and desire to separate myself from humans).

I think there are a few reasons that I don't have powers.
a) Bad DNA: I can barely move without being in pain, I'm supposed to have died before I was 2... why should I inherit a power gene. Especially since I know my parents had no powers. Though in a way you could say I got all the bad genes so I had to get something good. And I don't know if my grandparents had powers...
b) No motivation: If I had some power in me that just needed unlocking through practice I'd never find it. I can barely do the work assigned to me through uni let alone staring at a spoon for hours trying to bend it.
c) Undeserving: I wouldn't use my power for "good" in the strict use. I'd use it for personal gain, to destroy bad people and drains on society (and not necessarily save good people) and to save the Earth. Saving the Earth also involves killing many people so yeah... I'd be more of a villain to society than a superhero (think Poison Ivy).
d)Unappreciative: Eventually I'd stop appreciating my power or want more. When I get in my moods nothing about me is desirable and I know that even if I could fly or grow plants or read minds, sooner or later the novelty would wear off and I'd say "so what if I can "...", it can't do this and it can't do that therefore it's useless... If only I had "..." instead." Most of me wanting a superpower is me wanting to feel special, wanting to be proud. All of my "self-esteem" is based upon pride and a feeling of superiority and a power would give me that feeling. And for a few weeks I'd be untouchable but eventually it would wear off and I'd get that depression and inferiority back and I'd want a new power. I mean, I'd never forsake my power or wish it gone but this is not a long-term solution for hating ones-self. I know that.

I'm not like normal people in the way they seem to gain happiness from passing a challenge. This isn't enough for me; I gain happiness from EASILY passing a challenge and beating the shit out of it, because this gives me that superiority I crave. In fact, I gain sadness from only just passing and I don't even try if I think there is not much chance of me passing. When I play video games I will give up if I fail something more than about 3 times and I'll only enjoy playing it if I don't fail at all, and can pass REALLY EASILY. I have more fun using cheats to decimate enemies than to pass on my own merit. That said, I'd never cheat on a test because then I'd never know how well I did and cannot gain the feeling of superiority.

Without a power all I can do is try to be good at things and hope that it is enough to make me feel good about myself and get me where I want to go. But without that same motivation, this is also an empty dream.